To My Friend...

Dear Friend,

I feel like I've known you for a very long time. Much longer than I can actually remember. The veil hides the past and future. Were we only meant to know and teach each other for a short time in this life? Do we have more to teach each other or was it enough time? If we were to go past "friends," it feels like we would make an explosive mistake. Yet, I am drawn to you and want to proceed. Dangerous. We must have been caustic lovers in a previous life. Our closeness is obvious to me and everyone else, but is it to you?

The main problem is that I don't think I really know you at all. Every time I think I understand something about you and try to predict your actions, I am wrong. I'll even guess the opposite of what I think you'll do and turn out wrong. I also think you would try to change me. I don't appreciate when friends withhold information from me for no reason other than to protect themselves from who-knows-what. I do believe you had a difficult life, that you are the product of your environment and that you want to do great things with your life in the future, but you have so much holding you back, mentally. You will seriously need to change if you want to accomplish your goals. You can't fake it forever.

All I know is that I have some sort of feelings for you and I have repeating dreams with you in them. I need resolution. I don't understand how you can run away from all of your relationships, whether serious or casual. Take responsibility. What does it feel like to have all of your relationships unresolved? We are connected whether you can handle it or not.

I think you should move away from your current city for awhile. You won't...you won't even visit me, I'm sure. We have chosen two different directions. You plan to stay there and I plan to stay here. Our goals send us apart. There's no telling where life will lead, but I feel as though we aren't meant to have a relationship this time. It's OK, really...I just need some resolution, though. Maybe in a year. If you can be brave.

Love,
Kristy

p.s. I dedicate this song to you: "How it Ends" by DeVotchka video / lyrics